New terror legislation we'd all like to see...

The Government today announced a further crackdown on those it suspects of being terrorists or terrorist sympathisers. After the recent spate of attacks on the DVLA, John Reid has called for the leaders of the motoring community to take a firm stand against terrorism. He also added that the government may have to introduce 'transport profiling', with those who owned cars forced to undergo more thorough searches at airports.

"It is clear that amongst the community of car users there is a radical fringe which poses a danger to our freedoms," he said "And until moderate car users do more to distance themselves from these extremists we have no choice but to put these new restrictions in place."

Hate preachers such as Jeremy Clarkson, and the baldy ratty-looking one off the other car programme will be detained as terror suspects. Dr Reid opined that some sections of the car-owning community were ghettoising themselves as 'motoring enthusiasts', making them more susceptible to the venomous nonsense spouted by Clarkson and his ilk.

The public were told to be aware of anyone wearing gloves with little holes in them, or muttering insane ideas, such as the fact that global warming is a conspiracy to stop people having fun.

Those on public transport were deemed to be quite safe.

An interesting article about how studies increasingly show that rises in the minimum wage actually lead to *gasp* more people being employed. For those of you that care about that sort of thing...

Here's yet more evidence that there are home-grown terrorists in our country and that they are actively planning to blow us up. However, yet again (see my post of 10th october last year), because they are not terrorists of the right religion you'll be hard-pressed to find the stories in the papers.

(Although it still evidence of our weird mindset that he's criticised for owning "rice and sugar, both of which can be used in the manufacture of explosives." And rice pudding.)

How many earths would we need if everyone lived like you?

Here's a quiz to show you what a horribly wicked and selfish person you really are. If everyone wanted to live like me we'd need four planet Earths. Of course, we wouldn't, we'd need fewer 'everyone else except me's. Or just better ways to produce the things I enjoy.Still, it's worth thinking about...



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Marsipan: Mission Video from the British Mars Exploration Programme

Have a look to witness some of the perils of Mars exploration.Come to the site and subscribe for regular updates of exclusive mission video from Mars and pubcasts from Professor Colander.Be part of the New Intergalactic Order!This was just a test from Digg to see that this worked. As no one reads any of this anyway, I shan't worry about filling up your RSS readers with repetitive ols shite. Now I'll have to look and see if it did (work).It did!Flight Director Barnaby Bottomley



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Is there life on Maaaaa-a-aa-ars?

Yes, we've remade Marsipan and so you can now find out! It's all new, it's stop motion: it's got voices, jokes and bits about aliens farting. Read it, lick it, like it, subscribe, send it so your friends...

And the mice in their million hordes, from Ibiza to the Norfolk Broads...

This is very interesting, and a great return to form for the magazine formerly known as Living Marxism...

OK. First crabs that look like samurai are definitely cool.

Second, astronomy brain Carl Sagan sounds like a muppet, which is also cool.

To recap. That's double-cool...

Miami will have a carnival when Fidel Castro dies.

Again, no comment. Too lazy.

For someone who is strongly rumoured to be converting to Catholicism at some point in the next two years, you would expect the death penalty to be a fairly serious issue. However, according to this analysis of the Blair's position to the death penalty in the European Union, it appears that even the threat of eternal damnation as a result of mortal sins pales into comparison to 'making things difficult for the Americans'.

Of course, I'm an American, and it wouldn't make things difficult for me. I haven't executed anyone in ages, not since the moratorium I imposed on myself in 1996. It was for the best.

I wonder which American he's actually thinking of...